Meet my son, Cubby

This is Cubby.

You'll learn more about him when you read Look Me in the Eye.

He's in 11th grade, a good kid. A solid D student.

Doesn't drink or do drugs, as far as I know.

Doesn't do any useful work, either, though.

In this photo you can see him lined up with his friends, waiting for the limo they hired to take them to the Senior Prom. He's not a senior, but his friends are.

The more observant of you will note that there are eight girls and two guys. I looked at the other photos to see if there were some other guys hiding, but there were not.

I never went to a prom when I was young, because I dropped out of school and joined a band, and those of us in the band hung out in barrooms and sneered at high school kids.

Today, as an owner of such a kid, I'd rather he be here than in a bar like I was. I was a feral child though, and he is not.

The female next to him is Masha, his girlfriend at that time. Masha's mother teaches Russian at Amherst College, and they live with Vikka, who is old.

Vikka and her husband were refugees from Stalin's gulags. They came here and he found work at Amherst College. Back home, he'd been a professor. Here, he was a college janitor.

Vikka went to school here, and became my friend Aaron's Russian teacher when he went to college, 30 years ago. She's retired now, but she brought Masha's mom here when the Soviet Union fell apart.

My friend Aaron subsequently went to work for the government, and then Radio Liberty, and helped bring about the fall of communist rule.

Anyway, one result of mom's arrival in the states was the later appearance of the girl who would become Cubby's date for this evening's prom.

As nice as he looks in these photos, you have just seen the good side. He is also vulgar, rude, and cannot clean his room. He seldom mows the lawn, and it's a fight to get him to take out the trash.



Holly Kennedy said…
John, you kill me.
Beneath that tough exterior is a father obviously bursting at the seams with pride. It's in every teasing word you dropped down on the page for this blog post.

Lucky you. Lucky kid.

And I'm sure he's been well worth your intial $4,400 investment in hatchery fees. :-)
ORION said…
I laughed and laughed when I read this.
I got my son for free as I was in the army!
But remember -- like a great car the purchase price is the least of it!
TR said…
Cubby looks great all dressed up for the show. If he hasn't learned to clean up his room yet, it is probably too late for you. The next person to have a chance at that will be the college roommate, then the mate. There is hope, John.
Kim Stagliano said…
I was charged exhorbitant fees to hatch my chickies. All the doc had to do was catch the critters as they came down the... hatch. I was not charged for drugs as I did not use any. Not even the good ones. I did pay a premium for them to inject 12.5 micrograms of mercury into my chickies tiny bodies in the form of a hepatitis B vaccine - I should have told them my chickies would NOT be having sex or shooting IV drugs in the nursery. Dumb bird. Dumb bird.

Cubby looks like a good kid.
Drama Mama said…
It must be quite a ride in your home.

The kid looks like a good one.
Trish Ryan said…
It sounds like Cubby has been worth the purchase price :) I love prom pictures -thanks for posting these.
Polly Kahl said…
I think Cubby - and you - can take his large number of female friends as a compliment. He was expensive. Our first was only $25. But he looks worth it. Except for the laziness part. That will probably change when he gets his own place. At least that's what I say to console myself about our two heathens. BTW I think he looks a lot like your brother, around the mouth. Looks like he got the family humor and intelligence. Congrats on a job well done.
Chumplet said…
My daughter and eight of her closest friends are sharing a limo to the prom, too. And they'll have one token boy with them.

The Cub looks fabulous. I take it he survived the evening.
irene said…
This post was HILARIOUS! I CANNOT WAIT to read your book. I think "polly" makes a good point. The apple must not fall too far from the tree in regards to the ladies (based on recently posted photos). Hatchery fees? Let's see...turkey tom#1 $5, turkey tom #2 $250, most recent turkey chick just over $500. Gotta love insurance (when they pay).
Tena said…
Cubby smiles like a kid who's hiding his braces. The road to the orthodontist is paved with ground up Krugerands.

Michelle O'Neil said…
He is adorable, and your writing is so funny.

Nice ratio he has there with the ladies.
Demon Hunter said…
Good post, John! And humurous to boot! Cubby is adorable. Nice pics. He'll learn to clean his room, although I'm having a helluva time getting my boyfriend to iron his freakin' clothes! LOL! :*)
Amonly said…
Hey John,

As I have shared with you, Cubby is a teen boy- it is all to be expected!

You know what I went through with Ian . He would not do anything and hung mostly in his room on computers until the end of his Junior year. I am waiting to see him in a tux. He certainly did not take a limo to HIS senior party- Not sure if he even went to the prom.

Now he is developing his profession

and he is out shooting the world , seems to have lots of friends at SCAD and in NYC, and is trekking in Israel and developing his Jewish identity!

Patience my friend.

Masha is lovely and friends with Mari- good kids who have possibilities we didn't seem to have then. (We of Russian heritage have passion and soul)

Maybe I can get Jack to mow MY lawn and Mari can water your flowers :)


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